My Self Talk, Mental Orientations and Contributions in 2013!

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Happy New Year everyone!

2012 was an eventful and exciting year for me. My sense of contribution back at work was tremendous and there were lots of personal learning and growth. My ladies are happy and both my little darlings are growing up fast and well :)

As I look back and reflect on 2012, I asked myself the following questions…

What things did I do well in 2012? What can I do better?

What did I learn about myself and others?

How would I have to change to be more effective for the coming year?

What would I think or do differently in 2013?

To guide me along, I reviewed my personal mission statement and life purpose so that my thinking for 2013 will be aligned with my “end in mind”.  Living my life with a purpose is something important for me. My personal core beliefs and values will shape my decisions, my day-to-day actions and determine my priorities.

In 2013, I will continue to live my life with passion. I shall continue to wake up each morning eager to face the new day. I will pursue my dreams and passions with fervor and give my best in everything I do (and in all my roles I play). I will continue to focus on the people around me (home, social circles, and work) because the quality of the relationships I have with the people around me will determine greatly the quality of my life.  I will be satisfied with what I have and who I am. I will continue to make my daily contributions to the people around me. As the saying goes, “A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.” And lastly, I will cherish every moment and to seek to live life without regret.

For 2013, I would like to focus on 3 important 'Mental Models' that I think can make a huge difference in helping me to achieve my personal life mission and purpose. They are,

1. Change the way I think and talk to myself (My Self Talk);

2. How I see others (Jimmy don’t compare); and

3. How I relate to others (Add value to others whenever you can).

My Self Talk

“He who would be useful, strong, and happy must cease to be a passive receptacle for the negative, beggarly, and impure streams of thought; and as a wise householder commands his servants and invites his guests, so must he learn to command his desires and to say, with authority, what thoughts he shall admit into the mansion of his soul.” – James Allen

Whether I like it or not, I know that I always have a running conversation with myself all the time. What is the nature of yours? Do you encourage yourself? Or do you criticise yourself? If I am positive in my self talk, then I will help myself to create a positive self-image. If I am negative in my internal conversations, I will undermine my self-worth.

Where does negative, critical self-talk come from? Usually from our upbringing and the people around us. By the time I’m 21 years old, I think I have heard the phrase “No you can’t” many many times!

Our self talk is very powerful. It can really influence the way you think and behave. I recalled vividly in 2009 when I encountered a major career setback, negative self talk flooded my mind. These negative conversations inside me affected my mood and behaviours. Luckily I was able to realise what the negative self talk was doing to me and turned it around by having more positive conversations in my head. Many friends and colleagues asked me how did I manage to overcome this major career setback so quickly. I just simply smile at them :)

If I want to change my life, I have to change the way I think about myself. If I want to change the way I think of myself, I need to change the way I talk to myself. The older we are, the more responsible we are for how we think, talk and believe (we are more “response-able”). I will always have a choice! Don’t I have enough problems and challenges in life already? Why add to them by discouraging myself every day with negative self talk?

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For 2013, I will become my own encourager and cheerleader. Every time I do a good job, I will not let it pass. I will give myself a compliment. Every time I make a mistake, I will not bring up everything that’s wrong with myself. I will tell myself that I am paying the price for growth and that I will learn to do better next time. Every positive thing I can say about myself will help to make my 2013 better!

Jimmy don’t compare

“If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself” - Max Ehrman

We tend to compare ourselves with others. Our status, our career, our cars, our bodies, our lives… After doing that for many years (as I reflect) I realised how harmful it was. What happens when you compare yourself to others? Usually you either perceive the other person to be far ahead of you and you feel discourage, or you perceive yourself to be better than the other person and become proud. Neither is good for you, and neither will help you to grow.

Comparing yourself with others is a needless distraction and it can hurt. When my career progression was put on hold for several years, I can’t help but to compare myself with my peers and that hurts. I felt that life was not fair and I deserved better! Negative thoughts flowed through me and it was a very ‘dark period’ of my life. It was not a good feeling. The only one you should compare yourself to is ‘you’. This is something I always tell my 2 girls when they compare themselves with their friends.

My mission in 2013 is to be happy and enjoy who I am. I will not compare and allow others to deprive me of my gratitude, joy, happiness, growth and fulfillment that is within my reach. I will become better today than I was yesterday. I will do that by focusing on what I can do today to improve and grow. I know that if I do that enough, and if I look back and compare the Jimmy years ago to the Jimmy today, I should be greatly encouraged by my progress.

Life is short and we should appreciate all the wonderful things about life and who we are. I know I have much to celebrate about who I am and I am unique. Comparing my life with others is not exactly like comparing apples to apples. I will live my life the way I want it to and I should expect my path to be different from others.

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Add value to others whenever you can

“Do you know the difference between success and significance? I know a lot of people who believe they are successful because they have everything they want. They have added value to themselves. But I believe significance comes when you add value to others—and you can’t have true success without significance.” – John C Maxwell

Most people focus on themselves because we always see the glass as half empty. Everything is scarce and we have a scarcity mentality in almost everything we do. We often feel inadequate, as such, we often focus inordinately on ourselves. We can sometimes become self-protective and selfish because we need to survive in this ‘dog eat dog world’.

If this is true for you, I suggest you should combat these feelings by serving others and adding value to them. Making a difference – even a small one- in the lives of other people lifts one’s self esteem. It’s hard to feel bad about yourself when you’re doing something good for someone else. In addition to that, adding value to others makes them value you more. It creates a cycle of positive feelings from one person to another.

One of the reasons why my work (in 2012) was very satisfying and fulfilling because I knew I had added value to many people around me. I was not thinking about rewards or recognition when I value add or tried to help others. But strangely, rewards and recognition came my way. Life is indeed strange, when you don’t ask for ‘it’ (can be anything), it will give you ‘it’ in abundance.

In 2013, I will continue to sow seeds that will value add others. I will use my influence, time, experience, knowledge and passion to value add and help others around me. This is also consistent with my personal life purpose. When I do this well, I know I will grow because I cannot give anything that I don’t have. In order for me to value add others, I have to value add myself first. Life would be more meaningful for me :)

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Well, there you have it, my My Self Talk, Mental Orientations and Contributions in 2013! 

1. Change the way I think and talk to myself (My Self Talk);

2. How I see others (Jimmy don’t compare); and

3. How I relate to others (Add value to others whenever you can).

It will be another exciting and eventful 2013 I’m sure because “if it is to be, it is up to me!” (quote by Johnsen, William H.)

Have a great 2013 my friends.

Love Jim.

Inspirational Quote

A mind, like a home, is furnished by its owner, so if one's life is cold and bare he can blame none but himself.

Louis L'Amour
1908-1988, Novelist

Night Shoot @ Gardens By The Bay

Enjoyed this 4 hour evening shoot with my photo shoot buddy Andy. We had a great time exploring Gardens By The Bay (GBTB) and had a great catch up dinner together. The last time we had our photo shoot together was...can't recall. 

I was not very satisfied with the shots I got. Some good learning with regards to using my  Micro 4/3 (M 4/3) set up for landscape and night shoot. Frankly, I prefer to shoot landscape or night on my Full Frame Canon 5DM2 because the sensor is larger and pictures will be clearer. Nevertheless, it was an experiment for me and I got what I wanted - new awareness and learning on my M 4/3 set up capabilities.

Besides the shoot, it was also a good opportunity to catch up with Andy, who happens to work at GBTB. Learnt a lot about how GBTB was set up and all the challenges he had to go through getting it operational (bonus learning). Andy is very passionate about what he is doing. I wish him success.


Entire album was shot with my M 4/3 set up. They were: Olympus OMD & Panasonic GX1 mounted with...Panasonic 8mm f4 Fisheye, 7-14mm f4 UWA, 12-35mm f2.8 & 35-100mm f2.8. One of the key reason why I love my M 4/3 set up because I can pack all the above items and carry them along with me without breaking my back. I was able to keep everything securely and within easy reach on my Think Tank belt system (See pic on the left). To find out more about my M 4/3 gears I am using for this shoot outing, just click on the hyperlinks to find out more.



Here are some selected shots for sharing. I hope you will like them.

The very imposing Giant Super Trees!

Some BW interpretations on what I saw.

Sunset was beautiful @ on the Super Trees

Photography is a very physical 'sport'. Look!

The sky was beautiful (and very blue) that day!

Now for some night pictures. Did not capture many shots I am satisfied with. I will most likely come back again with my Full Frame Canon to experiment further.

We also had a good opportunity to take a few shots at the Flower Dome. This was what I saw there!

Hope you enjoyed viewing the pictures. GBTB, you will see me again soon with my  

Full Frame set up. :)

JL Family Photography Practical Outing @ GBTB

Another great evening with my ladies @ Gardens By The Bay (GBTB). It was a photography practical outing for my 2 girls. I was very pleased with their progress and improvement.

Jewel was armed with a Panasonic GF1 (my first M 4/3 camera) and a 20 mm f1.7 lens. She was working on her composition skills using a prime lens almost = to a 35mm lens. She did well and was able to apply all the basic principles I taught her. She surprised me with a few creative shots!

Jovin was armed with my Panasonic GX1 with a Panasonic 8mm f4 Fisheye lens. She is the creative one. Jovin loves the fisheye and she is able to spot nice fisheye angles and creative shots. Many good takes from Jovin.

I supported my 2 girls with my trusty Olympus OMD (with grip), Panny 12-35mm f2.8 lens, 7-14mm f4 UWA lens and the FL-36R flash. My role was to coach and guide them. Occasionally I will capture a few candid moments as they go around shooting and framing their subjects. O.k....I was shooting too! Have been deprived long enough!

We had a lot of fun shooting and bonding. Girls were excited and we captured close to 400 shots together! Below are some of the selected shots taken by my 2 girls with some coaching. Looking forward to our next photography family outing. Next time, my wife will bring along her Panasonic G3 camera as well! Ha Ha.

p/s: By the way, this shot was taken by my wife with a Canon S90 compact camera. Don't ask me how many more cameras we have in the family.

Below are some of the shots taken by my 2 girls. They are still learning so the pictures are not perfect. Allowing them to make mistakes along the way and learn from their mistakes is the best way to learn and improve. :) Hope you will enjoy their creations.

The shoot practice started as we took a slow walk from Marina Bay Sands (MBS) to GBTB. Girls were very eager to start snapping non-stop. I was glad we were using digital cameras (and I brought along several extra batteries and SD cards), if not, it's going to be an expensive affair :)

My 2 darlings all ready to go!

Jovin took these several wide angle shots on the Supertree Grove. This was where I started to share with them how we should frame our shots and identify our subject matter. Also took the opportunity to share with them that any odd number subjects will make their picture interesting. The 3 supertrees were perfect examples.

Jovin was playing with her fisheye and below was what she captured.

Before we entered the Cloud Forest. Look how excited my ladies were :)

 Once we entered the Cloud Forest, we were greeted with a 35m tall mountain covered in lush vegetation. This is the world's tallest indoor waterfall!

Jewel careful! My GF1 is not weather sealed!

These few shots were taken by both of my girls. They were trying out the "framing" technique I taught them. Framing is simply using other objects in your photograph to frame the main subject. This is one of the easier composition techniques in photography. Not perfect pictures but my girls got the idea.

The shot below was captured by Jewel. I was coaching her on how to use reflection to make her picture more interesting. Reflection can make your picture more interesting but you need to know how to frame your picture in the right angle and master your camera's capabilities. Picture taken was not perfect but I knew she got what I was trying to share with her.

O.k. time for some informal pictures with my ladies. 

Below shot was taken by Jewel using her 20mm f1.7 pancake lens on her GF1. She was practicing on how to frame her subject using the Rule of Thirds principle I shared with her. Not a bad shot I must say. Well done Jewel!

Jovin was having a great time playing with her 8mm f4 fisheye lens. It was not easy using the fisheye lens effectively. Not many people like the 'fisheye' look. For me, a fisheye lens (if used correctly) is one of the best way to get creative in photography. The fisheye lens helps shooting in confined spaces. The Cloud Forest was perfect for the lens. Pictures can be better but Jovin had lots of fun. That's important!

Mommy was also lending her support. My wife Jo is quite a good photographer herself. She has the 'eye' and she started to be interested in photography way before me. How perfect can my family be??? A photographer's dream...Ha Ha...

 

Jim and his angels!

My girls quarrel a lot at home like most siblings. When they had their cameras with them that day, they 'shot each other to death'!

Always check your shots after you have taken them! My girls were taught to have the habit of checking their pictures for composition and clarity. Well, there are different schools of thought on this. Unless you are doing street photography or any photography that needs you to capture critical decisive moments (i.e. if you check your pictures after shoot, you may miss these decisive moments), I would advocate that you always check your shots.

As night falls, it was a good time to share with them the principle of Light. Shared with my girls how to take advantage of surrounding light when taking pictures at night.

Some handheld night shots taken by Jovin in the Flower Dome. Shared with them the importance of a tripod when taking pictures at night or low light conditions. Unfortunately I did not have a tripod with me because I did not expect to stay till this late!

Jovin called the shot below an "Accidentally Creative Shot". Cool!

Well, it was a great day for my whole family. I'm sure my girls enjoyed themselves and learnt a lot about photography. I am looking forward to better pictures from them soon. 

We had fun together as a family. :)